Hitzel describes why he did so in the film. He describes the thought of becoming infected with HIV as a “gift.” He says it seemed like the biggest prize, wrapped with the biggest bow.
Only, in the end, he realizes how empty the promise was. He concludes the documentary saying, “I just can’t believe that it seemed like a livable thing to me—there was no benefit in this (bug chasing)—and that’s just what really needs to be said.”
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